Friday, October 10, 2014

186 days.

Top : From a store in Robinson's Place Pala-Pala || Necklace : Gift from Joanne. || Watch : Bench/

I know that it was my idea, for us to stop seeing each other. Well, not forever but for atleast 6 months. It's not for me, sa totoo lang, but for you and for HER. I know what she's feeling right now and as much you deny it, I know that you still care and love her. I don't wanna be THAT GIRL. I don't want anyone to hate me thinking that I stole someone from them when I know that it isn't even half true. I do like you though. I like you so much that my heart is aching right now and I may go cray cray any minute now... but I can't stay with you right now. I have to sacrifice and endure those feelings.

Uggghhhh. I hate how clingy I could get. We've only been friends for 2 weeks and everything is so complicated already.

Bye I... for atleast 6 months.

With love,

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Secret Crush.

So I saw some notes/memo that I wrote several days ago in my phone and as weird and as freaky as it may sound to you guys, I wanted to share it here... just because I can and why not?

And yes, I was just listening to this song called "Secret Crush" and I don't know who the singer is. Sorry.

This is for this one guy I got to meet this year but we don't talk anymore. I saw him one night and dreamt about him right away.
"Dreamed about you last night. I missed you that much, I guess. You were talking about driving me home, guess you didn't know that I have a car now, the funny thing was I actually said yes to that. You also kept on talking about hair pins and when I woke up I was actually holding one. Hahahah. You looked nice last night when I saw you at GPoint by the way. Ugh. When will I be able to hang out with you again? I am actually longing for that, to be able to talk to you again would be fine for me.."

This is for my korean ex-boyfriend.
"Dearest Mr. S. Park,

I got to see you in my dream the other day. Do you miss me? I read somewhere that when a person is in your dreams, that person actually miss you. Is that true? Are you here in the country right now? 

I told my mom about that dream and she got excited too. She likes you too much, SB, a little bit too much, actually. 

Also - I miss you.."

I don't get it though, why am I suddenly dreaming about these guys. It's not like I talk to them like usual. Well maybe somehow, deep inside my brain/mind/heart, I actually miss them both. :)

with love,

Tuesday, September 16, 2014


I've been meaning to buy a new bag for weeks now but I just can't decide on what I really want. So I saw some designs that I may or may not buy online. Is it really this hard to decide on buying a bag? My mom usually buy stuff(clothes, underwears, and bags) for me so I don't deal with the stress of finding and deciding what to buy. Hahahah.

Here are some of the bags that I liked.

I want this bag because the design somehow looks like the Celine bag that Kylie Jenner always bring with her. I am in love with that bag of hers. If only this one is a little bit smaller. 

The same reason as the first bag and it's in black and white so yaaaas!!!

Both bags are from an Instagram account called ShopYourStyle23
Check them out. They have a lot of pretty looking bags.

And then I went on to Zalora and I found these babies...

I've been wanting to own a bag like that Perfume Box Minaudiere for the longest time. It'll be super cute
to just carry them around. 

And these bags!!! They're on sale too so yaaaaas!!!

Now now now the question is, what should I get?

And yes, I am still watching Harry Potter and I'm on the last 2 movies, finally. :)

with love,

Monday, September 15, 2014

I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

@Potters Ridge Hotel.
Top from a store in Robinsons' Palapala | Skirt ; gift from Jerilyn | Shoes ; Keds 

Yes, I am on a Harry Potter high. I've been watching the movies the whole day and it is safe to say that I feel like a child again and that my week is made. Hahaha. This is how everyone should start their Mondays.

So some of my friends and I went to some wedding reception venue around Tagaytay/Alfonso/Batangas last week. I was asked by my sister's friend to look for good venues for her wedding next year. It was tiring, specially I was driving the whole time but it was such a good excuse to bond with my friends and go on a road trip.

Mischief managed!

with love,

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Tagged... again.

Got nominated by my friend, Sharry, to do the Bible Verse challenge. I am not a religious person and I don't read the bible so I googled a verse to post... forgive me.

Revelation 7:17 (NIV)

For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; he will lead them to springs of living water. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.

I am nominating everyone to do this challenge. :)

with love,

Sunday, September 7, 2014

What makes me happy?

Was tagged by my little cousin, Hannah, to this "tag game" on Instagram and since I don't feel like answering it there, I am putting my answers here. :)

So I have to write about 10 things that makes me happy and 20 facts about me.

Here we gooooo~


  1. Family
  2. Pizza.
  3. Friends
  4. Korean Music.
  5. Korean Foods.
  6. My car.
  7. Kylie Jenner.
  8. Music.
  9. Make up.
  10. Crts.


  1. I'm a heavy drinker.
  2. I sometimes wish I am not as tall as I actually am.
  3. I have the hugest crush on Kylie Jenner.
  4. I quit college and I am unemployed.
  5. I used to enjoy driving, USED TO.
  6. I spend most of my time with my friends.
  7. I don't like being told what to do.
  8. I am currently in a relationship with someone but it don't feel like I am actually in one.
  9. The name ACE is my most hated name. I don't think I'll ever be friends with someone named Ace.
  10. Coke < Coffee.
  11. I seriously wanna get plastic surgery but I am soooo poor to even dream about it.
  12. I fell in love with one of my best boy friends. 
  13. I wanna live in South Korea, Malibu and Japan, eventually.
  14. I love singing.
  15. My mom gave me my car, it's a honda crv 2003 model and I named it Joonattan.
  16. I am stopping right here because I don't know what to write anymore. 

Fvck. I had such a hard time answering. WTF, right? I feel like I don't know my self more than before or maybe I just changed a lot and I don't know if that is a good thing or a bad thing...

with love,

Thursday, September 4, 2014

Once my happy place.

It used to be a happy place for me. I used to go there whenever I had a problem and I'll surely go home happier and stress free but everything is just different now.

Being there just don't feel right anymore and I feel like I should just stop going there. It's not healthy for me anymore.

with love,

Wednesday, August 27, 2014


I just don't seem to care anymore. I hate this feeling, it's like 4 years ago all over again. Ugggghhhhh.

with love,

Saturday, August 16, 2014

Inlove ako?

August 15, 2014.

Spent the whole day at the Guarino's because I didn't have anything planned for the day. I basically just sat the whole day not doing anything. What is my life? Hahahaha.

We also decided to play badminton but since it was kinda late (9:55PM) when we arrived at Raquetas we only got to play for an hour. It was all good though. Just realized how I can't play bdaminton anymore, I suck. Hahahaha. I am actually thinking of getting back to playing it again and finally get in a much better shape. Hooorrraaaaay!!!

They (Ate Love and Jeri) pretty much made fun of my boyfriend the whole time. In a way, I do agree with them. Hahahaha. It's kind of a big deal, you see, having a boyfriend when the both of them are still single. Hahahaha. Just kidding. It's just that they're right in a way and I don't even like the guy that much. It also sucks that he shows his "kayabangan" when it's not needed or whatever. So yeah~ I am not inlove. Well, maybe I am, but to a different person, which, again sucks because we can never become an item because he's still mad at me because of something so stupid I can't even write about.

with love,

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Candidly me.

HA! You do what you do to me right now. Don't answer my messages and ignore me all you like but I just want you to know that when I am done and eventually get tired of all of these, you won't even hear from me. You'll realize everything that you've done and I won't even be there to say how stupid you are to treat me like that. Don't you know that I am a master of erasing people from my life?

with love,

Sunday, August 10, 2014


It's not that I don't love you, I am just not there... yet. I actually really like you. I remember you asked me why I said yes to you, well I don't know B, it just felt right that time and I guess I was kind of pressured to do so.

I just hate that you feel like I am lying to you when I'm actually not. I am not a sweet person, I hate texting and I hate texting someone first, I don't feel comfortable telling someone what I'm doing or where I am and I feel like that's because I got so used to being single, so yeah. I am trying my best to change that for you but I just feel like you don't appreciate that and you just don't trust me enough that you have a lot of doubts about me.

Sorry if you think I am that kind of person. :(

with love,

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Where are my friends?

Duck face selfie because why not?

I recently realized that I don't really have any friends left. Of course I do have some but what I mean is I don't have as much friends as before and I don't know if this is a good or a bad thing.

I don't really mind. It just suddenly occurred to me when this one guy I know asked me if I can introduce him to one of my girl friends and I can't even think of anyone other than Jeri. What happened to my long list of friends? Hmmmmmm.

with love,

Monday, August 4, 2014


WhatTheActualFrick. Why would you message me and when I message you back you won't even answer my question as if you didn't start this stupid exchange of text messages. Fucking stupid.

with love,

Sunday, August 3, 2014


Ayo GG! Hahaha jk.

So last night I went to one of my college friends' birthday celebration and I can say that I kind of got tipsy from all the drinking. I sure had a good time. Happy Birthday Harold. :)

The point of this blog post tho is something I realized last night. You see, driving on my way home last night I cried because the song "Almost" by Tamia played on my phone and I suddenly missed M. The realization is that whenever I get drunk I always end up crying my eyes out for whatever reason. I just get too emotional. I could be crying for such a small matter as well, I could be crying because of the rain for all I know. It's kind of annoying because I don't like crying in front of people or someone but I can't really help it, can I?

with love,

Friday, August 1, 2014



As I am bored and our internet connection is as weird as the weather right now, I am rewatching The Moon That Embraces The Sun while trying to figure out what to do with my life. Hahahaha. No kidding.

with love,

Thursday, July 24, 2014

Pretty odd.

Hey hey hey. I am back!!!
I got busy with life that I didn't have "enough" time to post and update this blog. I don't know where to start tho. Hahahaha.

If it wasn't enough that I didn't have access to internet for a week or so, when I went back home, Bagyong Glenda started and it was brownout for a whole week. Also - I forgot my laptop in Manila and I basically can't function and blog properly without it but now that all is good, here I am trying to explain to you guys what happened to my life. Boring stuff, I know.

As I am typing this, I am watching Pretty Little Liars because I pretty much missed 6 episodes of it. Now I am feeling a bit frustrated because of it.

So yeah...

with love,

Monday, June 16, 2014

Over it.

I spent 4 months liking this guy who like the song "PANGAKO". I can still remember all of the reason and deets on how I started liking him. I say that I am over him and all but whenever I see him I just end up remembering all of our memories and it's kind of bitter sweet.

I spent 4 months making this guy who likes 711's hotdog sandwich happy. I spent my whole 4 months thinking about him, hoping and making sure that he is happy all the time. I even text him just to make sure that he smiled that day.

I spent 4 months running around telling people that I like this guy and making them believe that this guy actually like me back, but boy, was I so wrong.

The point is, I always end up liking someone that just won't look at me the same way I see them. It hurts but I am just so over it and I am sooooooo excited about being all alone my whole life. Not even kidding.

with love,

Thursday, June 12, 2014


If you guys don't know yet, I actually like reading. I read quite a number of books and I started reading novels and such since Grade 5, when my sister was still big about her novel/pocketbook addiction. She'd let me borrow her books and we'll just lay around and read all day. So my point is, I still love reading, but life is kind of getting in the way now so I don't get to do it as much as before.

I recently re-read The Fault In Our Stars and Looking For Alaska because I heard that someone is producing an adaptation of TFIOS and I want to relieve all the feels I felt when I read the book for the first time, 3 years ago. As I am typing this blog post, I already watched the movie twice and I cried both times. I didn't really liked the adaptation but I am a huge fan of the book and I am aware that  it is hard to put everything in the movie because it's only limited to at least 2 hours. I still salute everyone for making a good enough movie adaptation of The Fault In Our Stars. I am more in love with Augustus Waters because of Ansel Elgort.

This is basically what I wore to watch TFIOS. I was meaning to wear something
Hazel Grace would wear but I don't feel like wearing pants that day so
I settled for this blue dress and my new keds shoes. 

Yep. I won't be able to go a day without taking at least one selfie. 

Last week I went to Manila to attend a seminar and finally met Mr. Abel Gonzales. 

I didn't know what happened but I just stopped using make-up, well, I use still
do my eyebrows but that's basically what I use. I just feel more confident going out
without make up now more than ever. :)

I waited super long for them to call my number but the girl in the counter
decided to use a different counter machine or whatever that is so I didn't get
to go when it was my turn, they changed from counter 4 to 3 so I got
kind of frustrated and all but Abel helped me so it's all good and I finally
have my ID now. 

with love,

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

The truth.

If you had the chance, even less of it, to read my blog posts, you'll know that I am a girl that floats just about on earth and that I pretty much have a very boring, if not, really lame life. I often think that I am nothing but a huge waste of space here on earth, that I am better off as dead. You may be laughing as you read this, but that is just the truth.

Monday, June 9, 2014

This is not good.

Good morning. I just got back home from much needed alone time. Just chilled at Starbucks for a while then decided that I wanna drink so I ended up going to Luxe Down Under bar and only had 2 beers. I feel and think that I can't handle drinking anymore. I got quite tipsy with just 2 San Mig Apple. I don't know if this is real life or what. Hahaha.

So I am here posting something when I can't even think straight. I feel like I'll regret this later on but what the heck, if other people can drunk call or drunk text then I can drunk blog post or whatever. Hahaha.

This is going to sound really cliche and hypocrite. You'll probably think after reading this that I've gone cray cray and that I shouldn't be allowed to post anything anymore but piss off because I wanna do this and I have every right because ; this is my freaking blog.

I just wanna come clean.

I am not gay, if that's what you're assuming this is all about.

I am actually not what I tell people I am. I over exaggerate my life when I tell people my story. I always add things that can boost my self up or I just don't tell them everything. I am such a good liar. I point at one direction but really, I am up to the other direction. I even cringe at my self sometimes for doing that, I don't really know. I guess you can say that even I get surprised when my brain suddenly tell my mouth to say certain things that don't really happen/happened to me, it feels like I am writing my own novel, only I don't literally write about it nor people know about it. I am also surprised at how people actually believe at whatever I am saying, or maybe I am just too stupid to notice that they don't believe me. Don't get me wrong or don't assume that everything I tell people are all lies tho, I do this to people I barely know or people who don't really matter to me, so maybe 20% of the time. If you're my friend, you'll know that I am actually an open book, I won't be able to hide anything from you so this don't apply to you.

Why am I posting about it then? Because I am scared at how other people presume things about me when they don't really know me. I feel like I give them something real bad and I come off as an arrogant asshole to them. But I don't really mind. They don't matter to me anyways.

Aaaaah~ such realizations and confessions keep me sane, really. :)

with love,

Sunday, June 8, 2014

What about angels?

After staying at home for quite a while I went out with my friend, Je. We went to Mahogany Market first because she told me that she was craving for some bulalo. After that we decided to just chill at Starbucks Magallanes for some needed talkshow. Hahaha.

My new shoes from my Ninang. Thank you Ninang Lhot. I like it.

Oh hai. Selfie agad.

What's wrong Je?

Monopod madness, I'd say.

Kind of tired but still so eager to make something happen.

Sorry na.

Went to our favorite ukay-ukay place in Olivarez and this is just one
of the many dresses I tried. Bought only one dress tho. :)

Je went home after our ukay-ukay adventure while I waited for my friend, Jasmine. Her work ended at 9pm but I waited until 9:20, I guess. But it was all good.  

My view the whole time. 

Then we went to Mcdo, just beside her work and ordered BFF fries with 3 Mcfloat. 
We just talked for a good hour. It's always just nice and humbling to talk to your
 friends about their life and just everything. 
I can't wait to grow old with this girl and just travel the world with our families. 

The next day...

My nephew and I craved for 711's slurpee or whatever that is.
Naka round 2 pa kami.

Ahhhhh. No words. 

with love, 

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Big bite.

Craved for pizza one afternoon, so I tweeted about it and my cousin told me that she'd want to go buy pizza with me. Brought my pink monopod as well, so we can take silly and random pictures for the blog.

Rainbow above the clouds. My mom saw this first, shouted and told me to
take a picture of it. These pictures actually don't do it justice. It was such an
amazing sight. I stared at it for a good 5 minutes before that black/gray cloud 
covered it.

I know I look scary here. My dark under eye is such a huge problem.

Selfie with my nephew. I still find it weird using monopod for selfies'
but yeah, I'll get the hang of it soon enough.

Hanna arrived from Abu Dhabi that exact day. 

Silly faces to annoy everyone around us. 

The only pizza store in our town. There's another pizza store but this
one is better.

Walking and taking selfie. Done. My nephew told us that everyone
was looking at us while we take pictures. Talk about not having shame.

(Taken by Aleck)
Haven't tried this Mulawin Hot Pandesal but Aleck told us that it's

(Taken by Aleck)
Never ending selfies. My nephew obviously enjoyed using my monopod.

(Taken by Aleck)
Tried this one. It was okay.

(Taken by Aleck)
I jokingly told him that he takes pictures like a blogger.

(Taken by Aleck)

Ahhhhh and now I am craving for Big Bite's pizza again. The only problem is that I can't afford pizza right now (too broke to even buy a Php200+ pizza) and I still need to lose a lot of weight.

with love,